On overcoming procrastination
I haven't stopped procrastinating completely, and probably never will, but I've made a huge turn-around. I procrastinated terribly for years, and for most of that time I believed it was out of laziness. I would put things off until the last minute and then use the boost of frantic energy just before the deadline to scrape up something passing. I almost never enjoyed the activity I did instead of the thing I was avoiding. I procrastinated with fitful naps or by joylessly watching TV, anxiously aware as each new program came on that another half hour had passed. I always knew that procrastination was about avoiding something unpleasant, not just guiltily doing something more fun. I thought I did it to give myself an excuse not to spend the time necessary to do my assignments properly.
It wasn't until college that I realized the real reason I procrastinated was so that I would have an excuse for not being perfect. I preferred to think of myself as someone who couldn't be bothered to do things on time rather than face trying my best and coming up short. Getting over this took a lot of reality-checking. Did I really think I was fooling anyone that I might be a flawless genius if only I had better self-discipline? And why did I think it was so bad to try my best and make mistakes? It came from a lack of self-worth. I believed that perfection was the only outcome that was good enough, but I was terrified that I couldn't achieve it. I had settled on laziness as a more acceptable flaw than simply being human.
Self-compassion and the growth mindset made me embrace failure as a learning opportunity, not as evidence that I was a failure. (A very insightful popular book about the growth mindset is Mindset: The New Psychology of Success.) That, and I was simply forced to give up the illusion that I could get where I wanted to go on aptitude alone as I leveled up in my career. I am fortunate that my field, biology, emphasizes practicing and developing new skills, so there's less shame around trying and sucking at new things than you might find in other environments. I have been so much happier since I started viewing my work as something I'd like to see done, rather than as a way to prove myself. Before, I was giving up the chance to actually realize my goals so that I could hold on to the dream (illusion) of realizing them flawlessly. Once I grasped that trade-off, I chose tangible, imperfect things over imaginary ideal things.
I read a self-help book, The Now Habit , which focuses on the psychological payoffs of procrastination, including the preservation of perfectionist standards. Self-help books vary widely in quality, but reading them with an open mind is a great opportunity for reflection and gut-checking, and this one rang true to me. Another reason people procrastinate, according to this book, is as a form of rebellion against what they see as impositions that have been thrust on them. The book's solution for this is to own your choices-- instead of thinking "I have to do this," you think either "I choose to do this" or "I choose the consequences of not doing this." Think concretely about what those consequences are, instead of imagining amorphous horrible things. Sometimes it's worth accepting the consequences instead of doing the thing you dread. The important thing is to accept the situation and take control of your reaction to it. Another useful point from the book is how much work it is to procrastinate. Just because you're used to it doesn't mean it isn't taking a toll on you. It's very stressful to be playing at the margin all the time.
The good news is that the less you procrastinate, the easier it gets to be timely. One thing that kept me in the cycle of procrastination was that I felt guilty going to into every project, like I'd already forgotten to do something. Now, I start new projects with a feeling of excitement and self-assurance knowing I am on top of things (or at least giving myself the benefit of the doubt). It's so much less stress and mental effort.
This post started out as a Quora answer to: Are there any people who have successfully overcome procrastination and what has been their advice?